For those of you waiting...

Today marks our 5 month anniversary of being in the states together as a family of four. Where does the time go? The picture above is our most current family photo. How much do you love Baby Boy's shoes??

As it happens, today was also the twins 9 month check up. They are, much like Mary Poppins, practically perfect in every way. They babbled and smiled and did all their little tricks for the doctor. She was pleased and declared them right on target developmentally. Which is a relief to hear because considering these are our first and only kids we have no idea what they should be able to do by now. And the books just make things more confusing. What to Expect in the First Year says they should be able to eat a cracker by 6 months! A cracker! How? They have no teeth!

As far as their stats: Baby boy is a whooping 24lbs and 30" long...that's the 89th percentile for those of you who understand that jargon. Baby Girl is a bit more petite but long: 17lbs and 28" (21st and 52% respectively). Again, the doctor is pleased with their growth--the amount of weight they have put on over the past five months is right on target.

For those of you waiting to bring your babies home--here is why this should matter to you: When we got home five months ago, neither baby weighed enough to register on the percentile chart. They were teeny tiny then but look what five months can do.

Here's another little story for those of you with babies in the Gladney care centers right now: Just last week a friend admitted to me that she had actually met the twins when they were in Addis. While she was in Ethiopia picking up her daughter, she toured the baby houses and saw the care givers holding four week old twins. They had just arrived at the care center the day before and were horribly malnourished and sick. My friend said when she saw how tiny and fragile these babies were she got all teary because she didn't think they would make it. She spoke to the staff and was told the caregivers would hold and feed the twins non-stop around the clock to make sure they were ok.

Fast forward 5 weeks and we get our referral call for two month old twins. When my friend sees our referral photos for the first time she gets very silent. I assume she's all choked up with happiness for us, but in reality she recognizes our twins as those same fragile tiny twins she meet in Addis and she's scared for us. Scared because she saw first hand what a long road they had before them health wise. But she's not a doctor so instead of scaring us with her opinion she decides to not mention having met the twins.

Fast forward again to last week when we have a play date with my friend and her daughter. Baby Boy and Baby Girl are rolling and scooting everywhere, laughing and hugging and being normal 9 month old babies. My friend finally confesses that she had met them in Ethiopia. She was afraid I would be angry that she hadn't told me this before now. But how could I be angry? On the contrary this knowledge feels like a surprise gift. Because now we know of someone, someone we already considered a friend nonetheless, who saw the twins before we did. Who had them in her heart long before we knew they existed. An eyewitness who can confirm what we have believed all along, that the Gladney care givers really did love on our babies every second of every day until we got there. I mean, come on, that's amazing! I am grateful beyond words.

I know how hard the wait is...I know how afraid you can be at 3am for your children waiting in Ethiopia but try to find a little peace of mind that they are definitely being loved on, and that one day--before you can blink an eye--they will most likely be in the 89th percentile too.

xoxo-
Kat

Sheer brilliance...at the speed of light

One night this week, as I was reading Baby Boy his good-night book he reached out and turned the page. Just like that. I got to the end of the page and he reached out his chubby, to die for little hand and very purposefully turned the page. I was blown away. He has had amazing focus for books and a love of being read to since the very beginning but had never really tried to grab the book or mess with the pages before. In fact he spends most of the book looking from the page to the reader and back to the page. He likes to watch your face while you read aloud. And then suddenly, out of nowhere....he turns a page.

I didn't react outwardly, just kept reading and at the end of the next page...HE DID IT AGAIN! And at the end of every page after that. And he has been turning pages ever since! Sometimes the pages get turned in an excited flailing (he is a baby after all) but most of the time he very deliberately turns the page. My boy. A GENIUS.

As for Baby Girl she also blew my mind this week. I entered the pit (our clever name for their fenced off play area) to play with the twins, like I do 20 times a day. But this time Baby Girl made a beeline over to me, doing her usual boot-camp scoot in double time. When she reached my lap, she bounced up and down and held her arms up. She was asking me to hold her. For the first time ever, she was asking me to hold her. I obliged and she nestled into my arms, looking around the pit like royalty. After about 2 minutes she was satisfied and wiggled down. And since then, whenever I enter the play area she immediately scoots over to me and demands I hold her. She never stays in my lap for long, just enough to claim me I suppose, and then goes on playing. And every time my heart sings.

I was a nanny for a 10 month old and a three year old...so I know a lot about those ages and up...but not very much about younger than 10 months. So it was kind of a shock to me when the twins came home at 4.5 months old to realize they didn't know how to 'ask' to be held or picked up. That whole "hold my arms up so you pick me up" thing has to be learned. So all these months I've just been holding the babies or picking them up when I wanted or when I thought there was a need... it was always initiated by me. Sure, they'd let me know they wanted me by crying but it was always a guess that being held was what they needed. And yet suddenly, that day in the pit, Baby Girl made it perfectly clear what she wanted: me.

Seriously... it is more than I can handle. These two developments. I am completely overwhelmed and overjoyed and overproud. My kids showing a love of books and a love of me....what could be better!?! But of course, me being me, I am also a tiny bit sad because I know where all this leads... today she crawls into my lap, one day she will crawl out...today he turns pages, one day he will read about a far away land and he will move there. Damn books! Damn developments!

I'm only 1/2 kidding. I cried when she crawled into my lap today...she's been doing it for a week now and yet today I cried. Because all I could think about was, "will I know when it's the last time? Will I realize when she has crawled into my lap for the last time?"

Fret not, I'm not sitting here binding their feet so they never learn to walk. 98% of the time I am joyful about every new development. But I figure I can admit to the 2% melancholy here because, well, it's MY blog. And if you can't whine on your own blog...

My children are gorgeous and brilliant and stunning in every way and I would not change one thing. Except to slow it all down so I can savor their stunning brilliance a little longer.

Happy 2010,
Kat

Melkam Gena

Today is Thursday, January 7, 2010 or if you are Ethiopian, it's Christmas Day, January 7, 2002.

On January 1st, the twins turned 9 months old (!). As of today they have now been with us for exactly 4 months and 3 weeks...one week longer than they have been with anyone else. We have now been the longest, most consistent presence in their lives as of this week. That is just a crazy thought. Every day is something new, and today the new thing for all of us is Ganna, Ethiopian Christmas.

Even though we live in Little Ethiopia, I didn't know much about Ganna so naturally I turned to the all-knowing Google and found this... excerpts below...

Christmas is a major holiday in Ethiopia. More than half of the population of Ethiopia is Orthodox Christian. The celebration occurs on January 7, the Feast of the Epiphany, instead of December 25...

On Christmas Eve, January 6, the city is crowded with pilgrims and tourists from all parts of the world. The people remain outdoors all night, praying and chanting. On January 7, the Ethiopian Christmas known as Ganna is celebrated. The word Ganna is used interchangeably with the word Christmas, to mean the birth of Jesus Christ (leddat). This celebration takes place in ancient churches carved from solid volcanic rock of that day and also in more modern churches that are designed in three concentric circles. Men and boys sit separately from the girls and women. People receive candles as they enter their church. After lighting the candles, everyone walks around the church three times, and then they all stand throughout the church service which may last up to three hours. After the service, the rest of the day is spent dancing, playing sports and feasting.

The preparation of the feast is an important part of the day in Ethiopia. A typical Ethiopian feast for the Christmas meal includes a main course, such as doro wat ( a spicy chicken stew), injera bread (Which is a flat round bread) and homemade wine or beer. The injera bread is used to scoop and eat the food, thereby replacing ordinary utensils.

Gift giving in an Ethiopian Christmas celebration is a very small part of this ceremony. Children, if they receive gifts, usually receive simple presents such as clothing. But, a very important part of the celebration is a sporting event called gena. This game is a form of field hockey in which sticks with hooks at one end are used. The game is played by having two opposing teams trying to outscore each other hitting a ball with their sticks. Usually, the sticks and balls are made from locally grown trees. In Ethiopia, the opposing teams often represent certain regions and the rivalry in these games can be intense. According to tradition, shepherds celebrated when they heard of Jesus’ birth by playing this such game...

The twins are sick sickies right now, with horrible snotty colds, so I'll be honest, I haven't put much thought into how we would celebrate Ganna. Luckily, Mimi's mom did so later tonight we'll wander over to our favorite Ethiopian restaurant and will at least get to give everyone Happy New Year and Melkam Gena hugs. But next year, I'm going to pay attention to this article and we'll have a proper celebration!

I wish I had more energy to tell you just how happy I'm feeling today...even with snot all over me, the thought that our babies are asleep in the next room, oblivious to the fact that tonight they will see all their friends, makes me smile.

More late, I promise. Melkam Gena to everyone!
xox-kat

Must read happy story of the day

Ok, so we all know I have become a blog writing slacker... but that doesn't mean I've slacked off from reading other blogs. There are still a few families out there waiting on their kids that I follow obsessively. And today that obsession paid off.

If you want to read a happy story go here. You will laugh, you will cry, it is DEFINITELY better than Cats.

After almost 13 months, Mark and Heidi saw their kids faces yesterday. And yes, I'm a little biased about how wonderful their kids must be... just read their story and you'll see why.

What a way to start the new year!
xox-kat

This time last year OR Our first Christmas

This time last year we had been on the wait list for 3.5 months and I was seriously deep into my adoption blog obsession, reading every blog I could find about adoption and/or Ethiopia. Sometimes obsessions are bad things (remember my search for the 'right' crib skirts?) but sometimes obsessions are cool avenues to great things. My blog obsession helped introduce me to this lovely mama who in turn invited me to join her Ladies in Waiting lunch group.

When I joined the Ladies in Waiting there were 7 of us all adopting from Ethiopia. Two had just gotten referrals, two were still doing the paperwork and the other three of us were in different places on the wait list. It was amazing to sit down and get to meet people on our same journey, to meet them In Person rather than just through words on a blog.

But as amazing as it was to meet these women, the true highlight of that lunch for me was when a recently ousted member of the Ladies in Waiting wandered in with her daughter, Mimi. They had been back from Ethiopia as a family for only two weeks at that point and I remember thinking as I touched little Mimi's hand "she still has Ethiopia on her..." It was like a celebrity sighting for me! I mean, here, in the flesh, was what we were all working towards...in 3-d, right in front of me... eating lemon slices! I can't explain why Mimi made such an impact. She was (is!) adorable but I think it was the fact that they had just come home, they had just crossed the finish line and that made it all seem so..... possible! When The Esq picked me up after lunch all I could talk about was Heather, Chris and Mimi and Mimi and Mimi and MIMI! He kept asking, "so who else was at lunch?" and I'd say, "and then Mimi scrunched up her nose! Her nose that was smelling Ethiopian air just 14 days ago!"

This weekend we took the twins to our neighborhood Christmas tree lot to pick out a tree. As we walked there I kept remembering Heather's blog entry from Christmas last year when they took Mimi to get a tree. I must have looked at those photos a thousand times... imagining what that must feel like, to do something as simple as picking a tree with your new child. And now, here we were, doing that exact thing. It just felt so full circle to me... I had wished upon Heather's photos and now here we were stepping into our own version. I, of course, cried at the hugeness of the moment.


That night, after The Esq hung the lights, we did the big reveal for the twins. They were whiny and fussy and I'm sure wondering why we were all sitting in the dark but as soon as we plugged in the Christmas tree lights everything stopped. The only sound was of their eyes widening in surprise. And we sat like that, the four of us, in silence, just looking, for a good 5 minutes (which is 4 mins longer then they have ever sat still before!). And every morning since, I have cuddled up on the sofa with Baby Boy (our early riser) and we have just stared at those Christmas lights while waiting for the rest of the family to get up. 6 am has never been sweeter. I might have to drape our houseplants in twinkly lights come January so this never ends.



December has just barely started and I am already a happy, sobbing mess over all the symbolism and joy of this holiday with children.... with my children.... I've said it before but I'll say it again...I just had no idea it could be like this.

Who knows if I'll get back to this blog before the end of the year so let me just go ahead now and wish you and yours the happiest of times. May you all feel as joyful and full as I do this year.

xoxoox,
Kat, The Esq, and The Wonder Twins


A few updates:

*Since we are traveling for most of December, we opted to get a tiny tree this year with just lights on it. But you can see I have hung three very special ornaments: The black and white Africa was made by my friend Harmony (you can have one too... just go here!), the two red hearts were made by our 5 yr old friend Pippa to celebrate the twins first Christmas, and the wooden cross on the bottom right was made for me by a boy at the Kolfe orphanage in Addis.

*Mimi and her parents are currently on the wait list again awaiting word on her new sister... fingers crossed, they could get The Call any day now! Now THAT would be a cool Christmas present!

*Of the 7 Ladies in Waiting--5 of us have our children home (a total of seven kids!), one lady put her adoption on hold and the 7th has her court date this Friday for her adorable little boy! We all gathered together this past weekend for a holiday party...all the kids in one room... the joy, the noise, the happiness...

Times they are a-changing

**First off let me say how much I have LOVED reading everyone's daily entries for NaPoBlogMoTaMaMa...or whatever the acronym for "write one blog entry a day for all of November" is. It's been so great 'catching ' up with all of you... I hope you all continue the acronym into December!

*******

We have made it to the 3 month mark in this new game called "Family." Last Monday was the three month anniversary of the first time we held our babies. The first time we touched their crazy soft skin, smelled their sweet-sour-delicious baby smells, gazed into their chocolate fountain eyes. And this Tuesday will be the three month anniversary of our walking into our house as a family of four. The first time our babies slept in their beds, played on the rug we bought specially for them, rode in the stroller to our neighborhood coffee shop.

Three months. Where, for the love of god, does the time go? Every day seems to last at least 2 weeks but when I look back it barely seems like we got home yesterday...certainly not 90 days ago!

Things are changing so fast...and with every change my heart simultaneously soars and breaks. With every little shirt they outgrow I grieve a little but I am thrilled at how well they are growing (Baby boy is in the 68%! This is the same boy who wasn't even on the charts three months ago!). I was exhilarated the first time they rolled over but devastated when that meant they stopped sleeping on their sides (with their little hands clasped in acapella singer style) in favor of sleeping on their tummies. Every day they do something new and amazing but that means they leave something else behind. Don't get me wrong, I want my children to grow and learn and change...just not so fast!!!

In an effort to not forget anything as time speeds by me, here's a brief list of some of the things that have changed since we first met the Wonder Twins....

When we first met the twins they were lovable lumps. Lumps that took two whole arms to hold so they wouldn't slump down or fall backwards. Now they actively participate in being held. They ride on my hip with their hand causally placed on my shoulder while they glance around surveying their kingdom.


When we first met, they smiled at any and everyone who crossed their path. Now they save those big, whole face smiles for us and are a bit slower to smile at strangers. When being held by new people they will both search frantically to find us. Once they see we are right there, then they are comfortable examining the new person.


When we first met they were bald. Then Baby Girl had one curl.

And now she has this!

They went from a slight dusting of hair...

To this! A mound (sorta) of soft, downy, curly/wavy hair on top of both their heads and crazy half curl laurels all round the sides.

When we first met, their only way of communicating with us was through long soulful gazes and occasionally whimpers. Now Baby Boy has full command of his ga, da, ba sounds and Baby Girl has a throaty growl that she likes to change pitch, volume and length of depending on what she's trying to get across.



When we first met they were immobile. We could lay them down on the foyer rug while we brought in the stroller and knew they would still be right there when we were done. Three months ago my living room looked like this (plus a few, tasteful, wooden toys).

This is my living room now. We have a full blown Baby Jail to keep the tumbleweeds (and plastic stuff) contained. They roll and scoot backwards and as of this week are starting to drag themselves forward using one arm and their chins.


And where they used to just lay side by side playing quietly with toys dangling above them... now they sit up and fight over toys in their laps!


When we first met, they had no interest or knowledge of each other. Now, Baby Boy will stare at Baby Girl for 4 or 5 mins at a time. She'll just be sitting there chewing on her toy or her toes and he'll just watch her. Occasionally cracking up in baby giggles. The other day I found them having such an intense mind-meld staring contest that I almost felt like the third wheel.

Which reminds me... they laugh now. Big hi-pitched fully formed laughs. At first it was like a car motor that won't quite turn over--one little burst of gaha!-- but now the giggles just pour forward.

When we first met Baby Girl, she had old lady wrists. You know what I mean...saggy skin that was all wrinkly and too big for her.
Now, three months and 5lbs later she has the perfect baby rubber band wrists. You know, the plush, pudgy wrists that look like a rubber band is making the crease.


When we first met them, Baby Girl pooed every time she'd have a bottle. Like clockwork. It was helpful when we needed to supply the local clinic in Addis with fresh poo because we knew all it took was a bottle. But now, they are both so grown up they just poo when ever! And all the time...5-6 times a day, with no set schedule!

The one thing that hasn't changed is how gorgeous they are...and how funny and charming and brilliant. Developmentally they are beyond their targets. Except for peek-a-boo. For some reason they still don't get peekaboo. Or maybe they get it but just don't find it very funny.

I don't really have a snappy wrap up for this entry... just things I've been thinking about lately. The mere fact that the twins have been with us long enough for us to notice changes...that in itself is amazing. I had no idea it would be like this...so much fun and joy and sadness all rolled into every minute. I had no idea how fast it would all change. I just had no idea...

Happy Thanksgiving,
Kat

Holiday gift ideas!

So the holidays are coming up and if you are like me then you are probably already stressed about not only WHAT to give all the people on your list but also about how to find time to actually get said items. Well, let me just say, that was the Old Me. The New Me is feeling pretty relaxed because I've figured out what everyone is getting...

My friend Jen is making The. Most. Adorable. Shirts. EVER. Check out her etsy shop: Lil Blu Birds. And if the shirts aren't cool enough on their own...then how about this: Jen is giving 100% of the proceeds from these Most Adorable Shirts for humanitarian aid in Ethiopia. Jen adopted her son from Ethiopia last year and is lucky enough to be going back in a month or so. While there she will be handing out fleece wraps to people on the street and buying cows & goats for the orphanages so the kids can have meat for a change. Warm clothes and food that she bought with the money made from her shirts.

Jen's son Abe in one of her super cool shirts

It's really a no brainer. But just in case you aren't sure yet, let's break it down into pros and cons:

Pros of buying a shirt from Lil Blu Birds:
1-easy peasy Christmas shopping. Just buy one of Jen's shirts and viola! Cross people off your list.

2-easy peasy good karma warm fuzzy feelings. Just buy one of Jen's shirts and viola! You are helping feed orphans and keep homeless people warm at night.

3-easy peasy way to look hip and cool. Just buy one of Jen's shirts and then sit back while your friends and family bask in the fact that they have a one-of-a-kind shirt that helps people.


Cons of buying a shirt from Lil Blu Birds:
(cue cricket noises)

oh, wait, THERE ARE NO CONS!



Go to Jen's etsy shop to see more cute designs (she's putting more up this week)
or
Go to Jen's blog to find out why and how she got started doing this

And start thinking about what you're going to do with all that free time you have this holiday season now that you no longer have to stress about shopping.

The shirts Jen made for my twins...how freakin' cute are they!

You can thank me later....

xoxo-Kat